The
FASS
Song Book
(1978-1999)
FASS 1978 FASS 1979 FASS 1980 FASS 1981 FASS 1982
FASS 1983 FASS 1984 FASS 1985 FASS 1986 FASS 1987
FASS 1988 FASS 1989 FASS 1990 FASS 1991 FASS 1992
FASS 1993 FASS 1994 FASS 1995 FASS 1996 FASS 1997
FASS 1998 FASS 1999
Opening Song (The Muppets Theme)
Sergeant Friday's Cement Galoshes Gang (Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)
Shine On Harvest Moon (Every Disco Song In The World)
Get Down Funky Mama (Something Barbershoppish)
I Love Rolling In The Scum (I Love Little Baby Ducks)
Tights And White Satin (Nights In White Satin)
Danielle Boomboom (Daniel Boone)
I'm A Great Big Centipede (Nothing Could Be Finer)
Who's Afraid Of A Little Beer (Who's Afraid Of The Big Bad Wolf)
Scarborough Fair/Debacle (Scarborough Fair/Canticle)
You Mess Up My Life (You Light Up My Life)
Answer-The-Door Song (Toreador Song)
Mozzarella Rockefeller (Cinderella Rockefeller)
Who's Knocking? (Barnacle Bill)
Interrogation Song (Typewriter Song)
Waiting For Godot (America)
I'll Beat Up Your Wife (You Light Up My Life)
Nail And Tooth (Heart And Soul)
Play It Again (Sam)
Dynamite (Silhouettes)
Logoff (Little Darlin')
The Punchline (The Time Warp)
Closing Song (Brother Love's Travelling Salvation Show)
[ Top ]
An Ocean Cruise (The North Atlantic Squadron)
Harold Mallard (Rubber Duckie)
Albania The Beautiful (America The Beautiful)
Drink, Drink, Drink Your Beer (Row, Row, Row Your Boat)
I'll Be Master Of The Planet (If I Only Had A Brain)
If I Didn't Have A Hunch (If I Only Had A Heart)
Just To Get Another Badge (If I Only Had The Nerve)
How I'd Like To End the Scene (If I Only Had A Brain)
The Wonder Of Bras (The Wizard Of Oz)
MEOP Blues (C C7 F7 C G7 F7 C)
It Is A Custom To Give Leis (I've Grown Accustomed To Her Face)
Life Is Grand (I've Got Spurs)
Pardon Me, Hon (Pardon Me, Miss, But I've Never Done This..)
We Are Meanpeace (We Will Rock You)
We Want The Bomb (We Want The Bump)
Nuke The World (Duke Of Earl)
Big Disaster (Morning After)
Hoo Is Whom? (Fox In Socks)
Aphrodisiac (The Monster Mash)
Ma Bell (Michelle)
Closing Song (Liberty Bell March)
[ Top ]
This Is The FASS Show (You Are My Sunshine)
University Bookstore (Winchester Cathedral)
Hey, Food (Hey, Jude)
Food Services' Food (Food, Glorious Food)
In The Gravy (In The Navy)
South Campus Hall (YMCA)
I Want To Be A Superhero (Just An Old-Fashioned Love Song)
Plato's Retreat (Lollipop Guild)
50 Ways To Screw The Students (50 Ways To Leave Your Lover)
Coal (Tang-Spam)
Our Hearth (Our House)
Neil Young Eat Your Hearth Out (Heart Of Gold)
Intrepid Astros (Junior Birdmen)
Superhero Reprise (Red Rubber Ball)
A Spaceship (Ach Du Lieber Augustine)
Studio /360 (Puff The Magic Disco)
WIDJET (A Bicycle Built For Two)
I Forget With You Milk (Thank You Very Much Milk)
Hey Sue (Octopus's Garden)
Hi Ho (Hi Ho)
Over At The PRG Place (Over At The Frankenstein Place)
No Way, Jose (Scarborough Fair)
Torn Between Two Tow-Trucks (Torn Between Two Lovers)
You Can't Do Anything (Anything You Can Do)
Sergeant Peppers Band (Close Encounters Theme)
You Funded Me (You Needed Me)
Sex & Drugs & Downhill Skis (Sex & Drugs & Rock'n'Roll)
The Banana Blitz Song (The Banana Splits Song)
The Show So Far (Science Fiction Double Feature)
The Bonzo Cat In The Hat Comes Back (The Rain In Spain)
I Want To Be A Superhero (Reprise) (Just An Old-Fashioned Love Song)
Bye Bye Earth (Bye Bye Love)
Bye Bye FASS (Bye Bye Love)
[ Top ]
Opening Song (Yankee Doodle Dandy)
A Bit Of Oil (Wouldn't It Be Lovely)
Rhinestone Robot (Rhinestone Cowboy)
The Bright Side Of Life (The Obvious Song)
Amputation (Toucha-Toucha)
Mister Screw (Mister Kite)
Lasers And Phasers (Favorite Things)
The Canadian National Unity Song (Hallelujah Chorus)
Fassablanca (Carling's Red Cap)
Happy Elves (Jingle Bells)
BLCRA (Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious)
A Spoonful Of Slander (A Spoonful Of Sugar)
Smear Them (Both Sides)
Down With The Army (Balls To Your Partner)
Closing Song (Obladi-Oblada)
[ Top ]
Alice in Wonderloo (Aquarius)
I Mock Turtles (I Love Onions)
At ALICE's Restaurant (Sesame Street Theme)
Foods (Campbell Soup Song)
Hank The Herald (Hark, The Herald Angels Sing)
How Can You Mend A Broken Egg (How Can You Mend A Broken Heart)
Higher Education (Stairway To Heaven/Gilligan's Island)
The Safety Song (Yellow Submarine)
When We're On The Throne (When I'm 64)
Hasenpfeffer (Hey, Big Spender)
Opera's A Bore (Toreador From Carmen)
It's Called University (It's Still Rock & Roll to Me)
Sentimental Cop-out Ending (Oz Medley)
[ Top ]
Opening Song (Danny's Song)
Wicked (Sweet Revenge (by John Prine))
He's Always A Puppy (She's Always A Woman)
Take Me Home, Ruby Shoes (Take Me Home, Country Roads)
Nightmare Believer (Daydream Believer)
On The Star Ship Enterprise (On The Good Ship Lollypop)
The Crew in the Bright White Spaceship (The Boys in the Bright White Sportscar)
Sherwood Forest (Oklahoma)
Bond (One)
On The Cover Of The Roman Tome (On The Cover Of The Rolling Stone)
Look What FASS Did To My Play (Look What They've Done To My Song)
Modern Great Librarian (Modern Major General)
Evil Coordinator's Song (Who Put The Bomp)
The Book Warp (The Time Warp)
Sentimental Unrequited Love Song (I Am A Rock)
Co-op Monkeys (We're The Monkees)
Ballad Of Moby Dick (Ballad Of Jed Clampet)
I Turned To Evil (I'm Getting Married)
No Evil (No Business)
Bye, Bye Mary (Herod's Song)
Closing Song (Cabaret Medley)
[ Top ]
Fed Hall Song (Meaning Of Life Universe Song)
Putting On A Show (Singin' In The Rain)
I Would Travel (If I Only Had)
FASS (Hair)
Costa Living (One Way Or Another)
I Got Flu, Babe (I Got You, Babe)
Raw-nold Ray-gan! (New York, New York)
Burger King (Burger King)
This Gland Is Your Gland (This Land Is Your Land)
Monty's Duet (Various Tunes)
Docilenol (Memory)
Gentlemen Prefer Pain (Gentlemen Prefer Haines)
Blow Up Big Mother With The Bomb (Up The Ladder To The Roof)
Grenayda/Grenahda (Let's Call The Whole Thing Off)
Power To The People (Consider Yourself)
In The Subway (Feelin' Groovy)
Our Plot (Captain of the Queen's Navy)
Another Fruitcake (Don't Cry For Me, Argentina)
Backsliding Anthem (Tomorrow)
Resolution (Revolution)
FASSDance (What A Feeling)
CIA Song (Union Label)
Fun (Tomorrow)
More (Sweet Georgia Brown)
More (In The Jungle)
[ Top ]
Opening Song (Washington Post)
Into The End Zone (Laverne & Shirley Theme)
Cockroachman (Spider-Man Theme)
The Director's Lament (Maria/Tonight)
Lightsabers (Life Savers Commercial)
Knock'em Out Cold (Tell Him)
All I Want Is A Liberal Arts Degree (All I Want Is A Room In Bloomsbury)
We're Off To See The Fed Hall (We're Off To See The Wizard)
Superheroes Gonna Rumble Tonight (Betty-Lou's Getting Out Tonight)
With Bat Like Tread (With Cat Like Tread)
We Are The Pros (Anything Goes)
Beating up the Twits (Putting on the Ritz)
That's How it Percolates (Hokey Pokey)
Escape of Mary Anne (I Am Sixteen, Going on Seventeen)
They're Milking Us Dry (Jesus Must Die)
I Don't Know How To End It (I Don't Know How To Love Him)
If I Only Had The Ring (If I Only Had A Brain)
Viking Just Wanna Have Fun (Girls Just Wanna Have Fun)
Three Commissioners (Three Little Maids)
Bessie's Gone (For The Longest Time)
Almost Heaven, Purgatory (Country Roads)
The Judgement (The Love Boat)
Judgement Day (Jamaica Farewell)
FASS! (FAME!)
[ Top ]
Fire's Burning (Fire's Burning)
Mystery Tonight (Comedy Tonight)
Lucky In Love (Rainbow Connection)
It's Got To Be A Communist Plot (You've Got To Pick A Pocket Or Two)
Poor Harriet's Dead (Do-Re-Mi/Goodnight, Farewell)
If You Love Me, Mort (Strangers In The Night)
One Night In Hellhouse (One Night In Bangkok)
Zombies (When Johnny Comes Marching Home)
Immaterial Girl (Material Girl)
Death Is All For The Best (Yes, It's All For The Best)
The Objectionable Philosophy (Hush Hush)
A Curse On You (Alas For You)
C'est Moi (C'est Moi)
Herbie (Oscar Meyer)
Just A Scientist (Just A Gigolo/I Ain't Got Nobody)
I'm Getting Buried (I'm Gettied Married In The Morning)
Jekyll House Cats (Jellicle Cats)
Haunted House (The Old Gumbie Cat)
Jekyll House (Skimbleshanks)
Computer Fees (Dancin' In The Street)
Beelzebub (Da-Doo-Ron-Ron)
Killer (Thriller)
That Was The Play (Those Were The Days)
[ Top ]
FASS 25th Anniversary (Everything's Coming Up Roses)
The Sound Of Gunfire (Sound Of Music)
Some Forgotten Island (Some Enchanted Evening)
They Say That In The Falklands (They Say That In The Army)
Same Song (Time Warp)
Why Can't Professors Teach The Artsies ... (Why Can't The English Teach Their Children ...)
So, This Is University (Oh, Wouldn't It Be Loverly)
This Stupid Machine (On The Street Where You Live)
The Plane Domain (The Rain In Spain)
When You Edit It Enough (With A Little Bit Of Luck)
Dance Audition (One)
I'se The B'y That Builds The Boat (The Same)
What I Did For FASS (What I Did For Love)
Falklands (Washington Post)
The Greatest Romantic Love Song (Suddenly Seymour)
Can't Hear Us For the Band (Let's Hear It For The Boy)
FASS Tonight (Mac The Knife (Nelson Riddle Style))
On With The Show (This Is It)
That's Warrior Football (That's Entertainment)
Malvinas Getaway (Hernando's Hideaway)
Captain Penguin, He's Our Hero (Ode To Joy)
The Show So Far (The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald)
Prince Andrew's Helicopter (Wells Fargo Wagon)
Hey, Look, It's Over! (Hey, Look Me Over!)
We Were Glad To Have You With Us (We Need A Little Christmas)
[ Top ]
Make A Date With FASS 88 (Jack Cooper's Original #1)
We Build The ICR (We Sail The Ocean Blue)
Barbarity (Lydia The Tattooed Lady)
Somewhere (Somewhere)
We'll Dine Out Together (Happy Together)
Bittersweet Love (To A Wild Rose)
Everyone Looks Crazy To Me (I'm Crazy 'Bout My Baby)
I'm Glad You're Mine (A Job Well Done)
It's Just Two Dates (A Job Well Done)
Darn Right (Quintet)
We Built The ICR (We Sail The Ocean Blue)
The Perfect Job (Somewhere Out There)
Last Call at Fed Hall (Floor Show/Don't Dream It)
Steal A Kiss From Me (Come Go With Me)
I'm Glad You're Mine (Reprise) (A Job Well Done)
I Am Single (Sixteen Going On Seventeen)
Meditate (Shall We Dance?)
Tomorrow (Jack Cooper's Original #2)
A Dojo Of Our Own (Somewhere That's Green)
Goodbye (Kiss Him Goodbye)
[ Top ]
The Opening Song(s) (Amazing Grace, Swing Low Sweet Chariot, Club Med)
Glamourous Job (Summer Nights)
A Brief Song (Top Hat)
Oskar Warner Polka Song (Oscar Meyer Weiner Song)
When Will I Get Laid (When Will I Be Loved)
Dough, Ray, Me (Doh, Re, Mi)
Peanut Gall'ry (Playground in my Mind)
Peanut Gall'ry (Reprise)
Baseball On His Mind (Gentle On My Mind)
Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend (Diamonds Are a Girl's Best Friend)
That's A Story (That's Amore)
The Maple Spangled Baseball Boogie (Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy)
To Hell And Back, Just For You (Put A Little Love In Your Heart)
[ Top ]
Thus Spoke Sarah Bernhardt (Also Sprach Zarathustra)
The Winds Of Change (Do You Hear The People Sing)
Progress (Dear World)
Chorus #1 (Something Poetic)
Chorus #2 (Something Monotone)
Chorus #3 (The Alternate School Song)
Chorus #4 (Something Rappish)
Always (Always)
... No, I Smoke BEFORE Sex (Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas)
Waterloo (Camelot)
Imprint (Skid Row)
Fortune's Fool (Rubber Ducky)
He's a Jolly Othello (He's a Jolly Good Fellow)
To Be Happy Or Not To Be Happy (Don't Worry, Be Happy)
Head Don (Don Giovanni)
Head Don (Bring Me My Bride)
I've a Hunch (Being Green)
Null Opera End (Orpheus (Speedy Muffler Theme))
Grad Club Rendezvous (Seaside Rendezvous)
Do You Hear The People Laugh? (Do You Hear The People Sing?)
[ Top ]
Opening Song (On Broadway)
A Little TV Station (A Lotta Locomotion)
I Can See It Now (If My Friends Could See Me Now)
At CKMS (You Can't Hurry Love)
Secret Cajun Men (Secret Agent Man)
Software in One Night (Music of the Night)
Carla, Won't You Lighten Up? (Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Da)
Zulu Dawn (Delta Dawn)
I'm Quitting (Laverne And Shirley Theme)
Election (Greased Lightning)
Blaine, You're A Failure (Beauty School Dropout)
I Don't Want A Mech Eng Man (Only The Good Die Young)
Nigel Rathbone's Fed Election Plan (Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)
It's Live (Rawhide)
Food Services Green Campaign (Original Music by Jack Cooper)
Intelligent Bipedal Rabbit Clan (Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band)
Closing Song (TV Theme Medley)
[ Top ]
FASS (Free)
Mad (Bad)
It's Still Utter Hell To Me (It's Still Rock And Roll To Me)
The Stone Song (Who Will Buy?)
A Story (Tomorrow)
They Don't Build Us Temples Anymore (You Don't Bring Me Flowers)
One Fine Day You're Gonna Want Us For An A (One Fine Day)
It's Fun to be a Bad Guy Anyway (Y.M.C.A.)
Exercise (Potiphar)
Chuckie (Memory)
We're the Inspiration (You're the Inspiration)
The Trojans (Les Poissons (The Little Mermaid))
I Could Have Hammed All Night (I Could Have Danced All Night)
Working at Fed Hall (Master of the House)
The Muses (We [The Roches])
Being In A FASS Show's A Delight (There's A Light At The End Of The Tunnel)
[ Top ]
On The Big Screen (Under The Sea)
Swing An Epee (Swing On A Star)
Three Lonely Maids From Leeds (Three Little Maids From School)
The Ballad Of The Baseball Game (The Gilligan's Island Theme)
Murder She Sang (Ascot Gavotte)
A Gangster's Life (A Policeman's Lot)
The Oscar Show (Hooray For Hollywood)
Women And Men (Enid)
Jerusalem (New York New York)
If We Had A Decent Ending (If I Had A Million Dollars)
[ Top ]
A Play Like FASS (A Friend Like Me)
Interview By The Dashboard Light (Paradise By The Dashboard Light)
Sensitive Ninja Clan (Pinball Wizard)
Deal With Me (Prince Ali)
I Won't Buy That (I Will Do Anything For Love)
First Imp-ressions (Tiny Toons Adventures Theme)
Stereotypes (Summer Nights)
This was FASS (Be Our Guest)
[ Top ]
Yet Another FASS (Animaniacs)
Stay With Me (Grow for Me)
Naughty, Naughty, Naughty (Holy, Holy, Holy)
So Tonight (There's A Light)
Oh Poor Trudy (Hot Patootie)
My Favourite Drinks (My Favorite Things)
Butchery Tonight (Comedy Tonight)
Opening Reprise (Animaniacs)
Charlie's Angels (The Brady Bunch)
Dead Gang (Chain Gang)
Blood, Blood, Glorious Blood (The Hippopotamus)
Bringing Back The 60s Tonight (Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds)
Imagine (Imagine)
Hummana Dimes Mustard Can and Ball Sly (Blowin' in the Wind)
Bringing Back The 60s Tonight (Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds)
Meteorologist (Lumberjack)
I Just Can't Wait To Play God (I Just Can't Wait To Be King)
It's Gotta Be FASS (Heart)
[ Top ]
Opening Song (YMCA)
Will's Problems (Da Do Ron Ron)
A Whole New Vein (A Whole New World)
Won't Matter Who We Fire (We Didn't Start the Fire)
Vampire Boys (Glamour Boys)
I Am Doctor Who (When I'm Sixty-Four)
A Villainess, Part I (The Life I Lead)
A Villainess, Part II (The Life I Lead)
A Villainess, Part III (The Life I Lead)
A Villainess, Part IV (The Life I Lead)
Hospital Life (Crocodile Rock)
Queen Of Pain (Luck Be A Lady Tonight)
You're A Woman, Too (I'll Be There For You (Friends' Theme))
Voices In My Head (Colours of the Wind)
Fight Song (One Jump Ahead)
This is FASS (Let it Snow)
Closing Song (Joy to the World)
[ Top ]
Come See the Show (You Oughta Know)
Premier Mike (The Grinch Song)
Wizard Merlin (Mr. Sandman)
King Arthur Song, Part I (Brady Bunch)
King Arthur Song, Part II (Brady Bunch)
King Arthur Song, Part III (Brady Bunch)
The Royal Nookie Chambers (Wells Fargo Wagon)
Obligatory Lesbian Love Song (King Herod's Song)
Sir Gawaine: the Orkney Knight (Skimbleshanks: the Railway Cat)
I Have a Plan (Original Music)
Modern University (Modern Major-General)
We Won't Let You Ignore Us (We're Not Gonna Take It)
The Day The Kingdom Died (American Pie)
Closing Song (Take On Me)
[ Top ]
Waterloo (Waterloo)
Why Must You Fight a Strong Libido (What Do You Do With a Drunken Sailor)
Sex and Love (Up and Down)
The Rules (The Preamble to the US Constitution)
Say Yes (Process Man)
The Unreliable, Fattening, Inconvenient Birth Control Blues (Original Music)
Having a Party (Surfing Safari)
Ambassador's Lament (Yakko's Universe)
Stop It (Waltz for Eva and Che)
Going Home (Wannabe)
[ Top ]
Enjoying FASS '99 (Stuck In the Middle With You)
Parents' Lament (Embassy Lament)
We Love This Job (You Sexy Thing)
Kowtowing (Tubthumping)
If I Were a Hit Man (If I Were A Rich Man)
The Mission (Tradition)
We're Facing Disaster (Walking on Sunshine)
Isn't it Heroic (Ironic)
Please, Ultra Woman (But Mr. Adams)
Oktoberfest Song (The Beer Barrel Polka)
Wa Wa Waterloo (Rasputin)
We Three Nerds (We Three Kings)
FASS '99 (Get Over It)
[ Top ]